Puny Word Play

Discussion in 'Bruce is Funny' started by radioactive, Apr 9, 2018.

  1. radioactive

    radioactive Active Member

    Joined:
    Mar 23, 2015
    Messages:
    528
    Likes Received:
    148
    LEXIPHILES: WHOEVER PUT THESE TOGETHER LOVES LANGUAGE:
    · To write with a broken pencil is pointless.
    · When fish are in schools they sometimes take debate.
    · A thief who stole a calendar got twelve months.
    · When the smog lifts in Los Angeles , U.C.L.A.
    · The professor discovered that her theory of earthquakes was on shaky ground.
    · The batteries were given out free of charge.
    · A dentist and a manicurist married. They fought tooth and nail.
    · A will is a dead giveaway.
    · If you don't pay your exorcist you can get repossessed.
    · With her marriage, she got a new name and a dress.
    · Show me a piano falling down a mineshaft and I'll show you A-flat miner.
    · You are stuck with your debt if you can't budge it.
    · Local Area Network in Australia : The LAN down under.
    · A boiled egg is hard to beat.
    · When you've seen one shopping centre you've seen a mall.
    · Police were called to a day care where a three-year-old was resisting a rest.
    · Did you hear about the fellow whose whole left side was cut off? He's all right now.
    · If you take a laptop computer for a run you could jog your memory.
    · A bicycle can't stand alone; it is two tired.
    · In a democracy it's your vote that counts; in feudalism, it's your Count that votes.
    · When a clock is hungry it goes back four seconds.
    · The guy who fell onto an upholstery machine was fully recovered.
    · He had a photographic memory which was never developed.
    · Those who get too big for their britches will be exposed in the end.
    · When she saw her first strands of grey hair, she thought she'd dye.
    · Acupuncture: a jab well done.
     
  2. 9andaWiggle

    9andaWiggle Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jan 25, 2015
    Messages:
    3,983
    Likes Received:
    466
  3. WAMO

    WAMO Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Aug 10, 2013
    Messages:
    4,688
    Likes Received:
    419
    AND HAS TIME WITH THEIR HANDS.
     

Share This Page