The Jewish quarterback with the perfect arm


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The coach had assembled the perfect team for the Chicago Bears. The only thing missing was a good quarterback, but he scouted and scouted but couldn't find a quarterback who could give the Bears a shot at a Super Bowl win.
Then one night while watching the news ,he saw a war-zone scene in the West Bank. In one corner of the background, he spotted a young Israeli soldier with a truly incredible arm.
He threw a hand grenade straight into a 15th story window 100 yards away. KABOOM! He threw another hand grenade 75 yards away, right into a chimney. KA-BLOOEY! Then he threw another at a passing car going 90 mph. BULLS-EYE!
"I've got to get this guy!” the coach said to himself. "He has the perfect arm!” So he brought the guy to the U.S. and taught him the great game of football. And the Bears went on to win the Super Bowl.
The young man was hailed as a hero, and when the coach asked him what he wanted, all the young man wanted was to call his mother.
"Mom," he said into the phone, "I just won the Super Bowl."
"I don't want to talk to you," the old woman said. “You are not my son!"
"I don't think you understand, Mom," the young man pleaded. "I've won the greatest sporting event in the world. I'm here among thousands of my adoring fans.”
"No! Let me tell you!" his mother retorts. "At this very moment, there are gunshots all around us. The neighborhood is a pile of rubble. Your two brothers were beaten within an inch of their lives last week, and I have to keep your sister in the house so she doesn't get raped!”
The old lady paused, and then tearfully said, "I’ll never forgive you for making us move to Chicago."